How Much Pain.

                          How much pain

How much pain can one heart hold.
Are there separate compartments for new and for old.
You work you way through it and think you've reached the end.
Believing you are in the place you heart can mend.
Paper over the cracks and try filling the holes.
But some are so deep, they go straight through your soul.

Your arms feel so empty, almost like they aren't yours.
You fight back the tears, but they come even more.
Hide from the world as they seem not to care.
Even when face to face it feels like you aren't there.
Why is it wrong, why such a sin.
Why should I hide that I'm missing him.

The world keeps on turning and life still goes on.
People don't understand why that seems so wrong.
Something massive is missing, my whole world is changed.
My heart is broken, yet to some people that's strange.
Strange I still grieve the loss of my son.
Strange that at times I still cry for my mum.
My pain does not go just because they don't remember.
Grief is the price for a love that's forever.

I know some people do not know what to say.
Some use that as an excuse for just turning away.
I can't understand because I am not the same.
Could never bring myself to add to someone's pain.
Avoiding the subject is not what I need.
Thinking my baby's forgotten just makes my heart bleed.
I need to hear his name mentioned as much as can be.
It might be boring for you, but it's everything to me.
Especially the days I feel like I'm going insane.
Hurting all over please just say my son's name.